Screw Your Neighbor

Ladies and gentlemen, Screw Your Neighbor may conjure up images of the proverbial "girl next door" with long blonde hair and a chest like the Appalachians or the guy across the street who rakes his leaves in a pair of cut-offs, but, be advised, this is a hard core drinking game. Consequently, there will be no fornication of any kind involved. Well, at least not during the game. As long as you understand this, and thusly hold no false expectations before beginning play, we're sure you'll enjoy this game as much as we do.

You'll need a pitcher, a large plastic cup (at least 24 ounces) and beer, lots and lots of beer. Further, you should have at least five people to play, for any less is considered nothing less than a sincere death wish. Before doing anything, fill both the pitcher and the cup to their brims with beer. Now, arrange your selves in a circle around the full cup and select one of the players to begin. We would suggest that if a disputes breaks out over the first play, the honor of beginning the game should fall to the largest and/or most violent of the group. Use the method that best suits you.

With both the cup and pitcher bursting with beer and a player ready, willing, and able to start the game, there's nothing left do to do but play. Basically, each player is attempting to put the player after them in an incredible uncomfortable drinking situation. The first player takes the pitcher and drinks as much or as little as he or she desires, the only stipulation being that the consumption must be more or less continuous. In other words, you can stop and breathe but you can't make a day of it. If this player is able to drink the entire contents of the pitcher the player to his or right must quickly drink the measure of the cup (that's all the beer, folks) If he or she is unsuccessful the pitcher is passed to the next player to the left and so on and so forth.

Simply put, you can drink as much as you like, and screw who ever you like, just make sure the next guy or gal can't screw you. There comes a point when it's hard to decide the best course of action and, for this reason, the game is based on strategy. For instance, let's say there's a lot of beer in the pitcher, much less than in the cup. A player in this situation would probably choose to drink very little of the pitcher in the hopes that the next person can not finish the pitcher. Even if they do finish it your still going to end up drinking less. However, other times you may definitely want to have a go at downing the pitcher, for if you think the next player is easily going to finish the pitcher you don't want to get stuck drinking your turn and the cup. Have fun, but please, don't be an ass.